Why Women Shouldn't abandon relationship because the Man Cheated

 


Infidelity is inarguably an offensive act to other  party being cheated on.  In whatever the context, be it business deals, be it political arrangement or in usual heterosexual woman-man relationship; dating or marriage, cheating should be a strongly condemnable act. It is an outright insult to long-blossomed trust between partners yet most  tempting  that can seriously lead to irreparable impacts in any relationship. Most marriages that have been descended down to collapse have been ascribed to infidelity. But as we fathom the concept of cheating and how each partners should embrace the aftermath of cheating, there is a becoming thought that there is gender-specific reactions towards it. Basically, there should be difference between how   woman react when her husband is caught cheating and in instance of when she's woman cheating. 

Shortly before I lay out the difference, let’s understand concept of sex and love in respect to both of men and women.

Love, in this case, heterosexual love a feeling of strong affection, care and strong attraction/ positive emotions towards another person is constant experience for two partners in it but plays out differently on how they feel it. In particular, women in most cases when they decide to love their partners wholeheartedly, they unleash it in full-scale and no other man can be able steal her attention from her man. Their feelings of love and emotional growth are progressive in nature and she usually don’t love at the first sight or immediately after the encounter, but nourishes her love as man’s pursuit of her continues. And in course of time as her mind and heart in totality are finally into the partner, her world stops being planet Earth and it turns to be her partner.  To her, what precede her actions and decisions in regards to the relationship is pure emotions, decision such as deciding to be intimate with her partner,-sex. Women attach sex with emotional fabric, in rare circumstances a woman will willing fully indulge in intimacy without her emotional approval. To her, she must love you first, she must be emotionally enticed by you she must approve her heart for the action to continue. That is perhaps the reason why it is uncommon to find women to be intimate with any man.  However, this is quite different from the nature of men in their approach towards love and sex. First, I do think, man’s love is regressive, implying that in many instances it is always the man who get attracted first, like, love and then makes the first initiative to approach woman of his amazement. Though in few occasions they maintain or even it grows more as he pursue the woman. Although, both men and women have commonality of emotions as fabric of their relationship, men sexual psychology is doubtlessly dissimilar from the woman’s. I might not be sure of fullest love psychology of men, but there is one thing am sure of, that men understand how to separate emotions from sexual gratification. While of course they have their emotional true loves whom they derive their fullest sexual gratification from, they explore multiple supplementary sexual experiences that do not have emotional shells. This is far apart from what women’s sexual experiences.

With the view of this distinctive approaches towards sex and love between women and men, I first reinforce the fact that infidelity is severely dreadful for any relations yet love is a vital necessity for any relationship proclaimed to be grounded in love to see light of the day. An instance where love decelerate or pass on, then unless that love is reawaken and strengthened that relationship will eventually collapse. And so the question is, in which scenario do love ideally start slacking off? Is it in circumstance of when the woman partner or male partner commits infidelity?




Why they its hard woman cheat?

In social constructs humans are raised, there are several layers of moral directives regulating women’s approach to sex. Unwritten moral laws that guides God-sanctioned institutions such as marriage or heterosexual human relationships that see as a woman as non-sharable partner, that she can’t be pursue two or so sexual affairs simultaneously as this will consequently lead severe societal damnation such as being ostracized from her marriage and from society or worst of all stoned to  death if it’s the olden biblical Christian times or if it’s the  far-much conservative Islamic societies morally reigned by sharia laws  that don’t condone such vices from  women. If in its today’s growing liberal world, she will be shamed, deemed a whore regarded as a failure who is morally inept lacking place in society. Furthermore, there is tendency of self-respect confines them from acts of multi-sexual affairs due to fear of being used.  In ordinary sense, women are pursued, seduced and made partners, not the other way round. It is not typical of a morally and self-respectful woman to give access her body to any man who please. The bottom-line is, when a woman cheats, there are many forces that punishes her, her husband, her family and society. This too heavy, isn’t?

So then why do they cheat, what does it mean?

Infidelity by women are attributable to variety of factors, including but not limited to; growing emotional gap between her and the partner. Typically, love relationship are founded by deep emotions towards one another, however scale of emotions could along the way start to unrecognizably decline. Perhaps it could be because the male partner is immersed into work, or descending into alcoholism or is too focussed on other endeavours in life that draws almost all the attention from his woman. His presence in his woman’s love life regress to an extent the women feels emotional lonely. At this point she is tempted to resort to another man who is fully available, who can listen and follow up with her issues and needs. For this one, although she can always talk about it with her partner, I don’t think she deserves larger share of the blame. Another reason, is sheer mistreatment by her man; if the partner becomes hostile, violent, disregarding and abusing to her, she will no longer feel safe, she will fear, and she attempt to flee for safety seeking refuge in another man with open and  waiting arms. She might not end it with her current partner sooner but she is seeing another guy. The third reason is, she just lost respect for you. She disrespect him that is why she is cheating, love in of itself is a consequence of emotions, sacrifice and most importantly respect. Love can only prosper if there is boundaries in that relationship, boundaries are demarcated by presence of respect of one’s another. As disrespect mounts, love declines and as her love towards him declines, it is booming for her newfound man. Is this reparable? No. I understand why men say, they can’t forgive a cheating women while expecting their partners to forgive them. It is because of all I have discussed above. Since there is almost everything that exist that literally deter women from cheating; from societal punishment, self-respect due to fear of being used by men and the fact that she can’t separate her sexual gratification endeavours from emotional lining. In majority of case, the love towards her partner is declining while nurturing the new one. Therefore, you will betting big if you decide to forgive her infidelity. It means that you will have to share the love with another man, her love towards you is spilt, it will never be wholesome again as it was earlier. Furthermore, forgiving her will likely open way for more grievous instances of disrespect later in the distant future. Actually, after forgiveness, there are high chances she will eventually quit that relationship in the near distant future, why? Majority of women expectation as a first reaction from man is leave her. It will be striking to her if you don’t, she might confuse it with weakness, she will know that relationship is no longer enclosed with boundaries, and because she hate weak you, she will leave for a stronger man. Or if it’s not because of that, it will be the overwhelming guilt of being the potent of doom in that relationship swallowing eventually forcing her to quit. So she will quit either way.

 


Many people ask, should a woman take the same approach if she discover her man cheating, or do I justify infidelity by man? I stated earlier, cheating is a disgusting, it is intolerable on both sides, and it inflict pain in equal measures for both sides. But I do think, women should take it slightly easy and not throw away relationship because a man cheated. I have heard my female friend saying, she would reconsider forgiving her cheating boyfriend because she can’t rush putting brakes on relationship since she is unsure whether he love the side-chick or not. This is opposed to a woman cheating, since it is largely because she started to love side-guy while disrespecting the current one. Men can sleep with any woman and never thinks of it thereafter, men don’t cheat from their hearts, they don’t invite their feelings to it, they don’t nurture an emotional attachment as women does but rather cheat from the mind. They don’t associated their emotions with their short term sexual urges. They do it and forget about it right there unless it’s with a woman he truly loves. My ultimate hypothesis is, love is the strongest foundation of a muscular relationship, and any action that signals its declines is dangerous to a thriving relationship. A woman pursuit of other sexual affairs heavily compromise love and in extension weakening a relationship. This is in many cases opposed to instances of a man cheating. This is not to justify cheating by men, but to urge women not overreact and throw out a resilient and promising years-long relationship because your man submitted to temptation of short term sexual desires.

 


Comments

Meshack Omondi said…
Hi. I hope you enjoy the read. If you find it interestingplease comment and share.

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